I am ...

One exercise in my Inner Excavation book is to write something from a starting point of phrases, such as “I am ...”

I am on the precipice of new understandings about myself and my spiritual strength. Engaging with others reveals which spiritual muscles have atrophied.

Mom (sister passed away) and Bri (cryptic and imploring letter) are having a rough week ... Feeling helpless, I lost my balance as I got caught in the undercurrent of their suffering. I swam back to shore only to be greeted by terrestrial, inner demons, Pesky and Creepy. I had to remind them they are not invited and had them escorted out.

I am carefully guarding my thought ...

I am refusing to permit anything antagonistic or unlovely to enter my consciousness ...

I am putting my whole trust, faith and confidence in the good ...

I am thinking with clarity, move with ease and accomplish without strain ...

I am expecting everything I do to prosper ...

I am allowing good to flow into my experience ...

I am seeing good in every direction I look ...

I am looking forward to more good ...

I am recognizing my union with all people and all events ...

~ My mom while in Greece ~

~ My beau and I with a fully decorated, hardcore fan ~

Dreaming on ...

In keeping with last week's advice, I decided to go for it and took the plunge ... Finding myself going down the rabbit hole, I came out of the other side greeted by his eyes, his smile, his romantic gestures. He comes bearing gifts, always. I see intelligence, humor and enlightenment for starters ... He's enigmatic ... someone I can't figure out ...

He said I am like the wind and cannot be captured. I think he's not only managed to see my hand of cards, but he understands it better than I do, as he seems to be a step ahead of my next thought ...

I spent a great deal of my weekend before him. I introduced him to kava and after getting high, we dined at a restaurant called Casablanca, both ordering fish dishes and expresso. As self-proclaimed, enlightened beings, we declared everyday is our birthday ... Being the prankster I've discovered him to be, he put in a birthday request for my Gemini twin, he named Bella (my carefree spirit side -- unbound by rules or society's restraints), and the restaurant, under loud speaker, proceeded to single me out by name and wish me a happy birthday in song. As I realize "resistance is futile," I helplessly played along and took it like a big girl ... 

As the skies only revealed a handful of faintly lit stars, we decided to reserve stargazing for another night.

This morning I was treated with a personal "Bed & Breakfast," the meal comprising of eggs, whole wheat toast, orange juice and chai tea. I must say, I give it a 5 out of 5 stars rating ;)

Afterward, he took me to the game ... I can't remember the last time I've been to one ... We both partook of traditional fare: Foot-long chilli/cheese hot dogs and chocolate ice cream on a waffle cone. There was only way to eat it and that was to also wear it, in part, lol. I'm happy to boast our team won, which I think is the way it should always be for home games.

Aside from indulging in loving experiences, I'm reading a book on increasing intuition ... it's quite fascinating ...

Anyway, here's my youtube pick for the week:

The Beach in November

I had another wonderful CS with Laura!  We started the day with breakfast at IHop followed by photography at the beach.  It was so brisk, feeling like the coldest day of Fall.  We caught each other up to speed with our respective lives/activities.  She discussed the parallels of certain characters in the novel she's writing this month, the storyline of which I will say very little for her creative privacy purposes.  It would be cool to be able to bottle a fraction of the creative energy she uses on artistic pursuits and then sell it ;P

I'm faced with another fork in the road and her advice is to go for it, despite there being so much at stake.  She and I discussed at length my tendencies ... I'm just as curious as the next person to see where my feet will tread; I will simply have to follow the signs and my instincts and do my best to allay fears along the way.

Anyway, after the beach, we ate at Seasons 52.  Also, in keeping with our routine, we also visited nearby bookstores (Barnes & Noble and Borders Books) to get our fix for creative inspiration and to do our part in helping the economy with our given purchases ;)

Love Love LOVE this song on Youtube:


♥

Fact or Fiction?

“I can believe anything provided it is incredible.”

What draws the line between pretend and what is?  What is fact or fiction?  I think fact and fiction are subjective and based upon one's chosen point of view.

In that light, what I elect to elucidate may be a compilation of such sharings, so I apologize in advance if things get confusing ... ;)

This month has been about inviting oooo and ahhhhs. In doing so, I've learned along the way: Whatever you seek shall come to you provided you have faith and get out of your own way. It's been fun and precarious.

On All Hallows' Eve, when the veil between the worlds was at it's thinnest, I broke my own rule and kissed what I deemed forbidden ... Though the intellect inspired much trepidation, I decided to make an exception to the rule after sifting through what I felt ... The day following, I was gifted with a wondrous bouquet of flowers, radiating colors of pinks, purples and lots of pretty!

Trying to find a place to re-nest, I've relocated my blog, choosing to currently replace the one with the below icon with this "Wonderfully at Large" blog.

I'm going through one of my newest book purchases called "Inner Excavation." It doesn't have new concepts, it just has an inviting quality that inspires me to want to be more diligent with exploring myself through photography, poetry and mixed media.

Who are you? I'm someone attached to my Pollyanna glasses ;P

How do I nurture myself? With chocolate, music and dance.

Who or what inspires you? Love; friends; sunny and soft breezy days; books and movies

How did you find your creative voice? Journaling and being pleasantly surprised by some of what surfaces.

I live in an eternal present filled with an everlasting good

I’m aggravated by feeling bottled up with stagnation. I’m not moving forward or so it seems. I need to paint a picture of how I would like to see my life.

I want love to surround and permeate my whole being. I want it permanently that way with no cares. The only emotions I want to feel are excitement, eagerness, happiness, buoyancy ... I want to wake up and say yes to life, to living, to coloring me and all I see as happy. To relinquish any thoughts of separation toward anything or anyone.

I want all to love me and I want to see the love in all.

I want to bathe in the glory of wonder, of how wonderful life is, people are.
　
I read this (I can't recall where) and want to put it here for future reference:

Yesterday is gone, tomorrow has not arrived, and I live in an eternal present filled with an everlasting good. There is nothing unhappy or morbid in my consciousness. I have no fear of yesterday, nor do I anticipate tomorrow with anything other than enthusiastic expectation. Everything good in my experience shall create my future. I have no fear in looking backward or forward, but realize the eternal day in which I now live. Today is big with hope fulfilled, with love and life well lived. Tomorrow will provide its own blessings.

If ever

I’ve continued my morning pages, and sometimes wonder if blogging here also is simply redundant ... or worth it ... ( ...?)

[edited via omissions]

Zip-A-Dee Doo Da

I could never understand why some enjoy cooking ... not saying I do now, especially when the chore of clean-up follows. But when a special taste clicks with my tongue and there's no other way to satisfy it, motivation comes knocking. I'm stuck on the grilled eggplant and portobello recipe.

The newest books I've come across are about focusing on the positive, always ... I guess in a way it's about disciplining the mind to focus on what you want, always -- not want you don't, or you'll get more of the same ... I wish it were easier when hormones and pain are afoot, when energy levels are low, when traumatic events occur and when adverse thoughts dominate. Like passing up certain foods, I will endeavor to pass on unsavory thoughts and only pick the best; the ones that feel good.

"Wisdom is avoiding all thoughts that weaken you."

In this eternal, unfolding moment I am filled with an expectancy of good things.

I've spent a good deal of my weekend watching DVD's. Anyway, this pic is of me watching several amusing scenes. I spent all day in my jammies, clean-faced and happy.

I have also spent a great deal of my time reading.  The novel I'm reading now is called "The Sugar Queen."  One character has someone living at the bottom of her closet who tries to give her good advice.  Another character is followed around by books.  LOL!  Anytime she turns around a pertinent book will be next to her.  When she tries to ignore or get rid of it, it continues to show up different places like coming out of her cereal box in the morning.  She now has a whole storage of books that have "showed up" through the years.   Ah, if that were only me... imagine how much money I could save, since books are such a love of mine, lol. 

Ahhhh, just heard the pleasing sound of nearby wildlife: a limpkin; yet when I look to see where it's at, I instead see a green heron and a great blue heron =) ... I so love where I live!

I have started drawing again, a little at a time so as not to strain anything. The inevitability of the drawing's completion is proportionate to the desire that spawned it. Don't mind the last sentence; more like a footnote to myself.

Ahhh to the dawning of a new day as I looked out my back door earlier this morning:

Lookie what I found, with lyrics even ... come sing with me! You just must ;P